she smelled like a LAN party
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize