For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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