She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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