I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
3 2 1 whiskey
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
