Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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