Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
