so explain again why im purple
no
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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