You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Randomize
