My brain says no but my pants say off.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Randomize
