So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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