My sheets look like a crime scene.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Randomize
