what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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