obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
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