I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
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