remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Randomize
