Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
