I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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