Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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