Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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