You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
