he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
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