New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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