And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
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