you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Randomize
