She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize