sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
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My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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