Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Dicks are not precious.
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