party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
did you just send me my own nude
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
