I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
50% drunk capacity currently
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Randomize
