I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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