she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Farmville is her only friend.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
You dont lie about slip and slides
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
