i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
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Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
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Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
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