I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
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he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
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you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
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