I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
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