Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
