I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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