I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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