Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
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