Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
