so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Randomize
