No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Randomize