I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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