I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
