Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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