I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize
