so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Randomize
