you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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