all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
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