I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
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