we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
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